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Towards the end of 2024 I was awarded the honour of becoming a Hakomi trainer! This feels such a precious experience to me and my amazing trainers and mentors Vicky and Trudy came to Liverpool to celebrate and we went to my favourite restaurant to eat and share together. Last month I joined with other Hakomi trainers for my first gathering with them. It was lovely to be connected in this way together.

The news is being shared in various places and Vicky shared the news with our Hakomi Lancaster community. They will meet this coming weekend and I am sad to miss being with them. If you’ve been following here for a while, you may know I’ve been fortunate to be part of the Hakomi community since around 2012 and this is the longest gap I’ve taken from being at the weekends.

If you’re interested to learn more about my journey with Hakomi, I shared some of this in a recent Hakomi Education Network newsletter and thought I’d also share it here.

There have been so many things in my history that led me to discovering Hakomi; a deep love of biology and a real hunger to understand myself and others were part of that. You might say I’ve always been asking where I stand in relation to the many realms of life. Hakomi was like a missing piece of a jigsaw I didn’t even know I was looking for. Initially I wasn’t that interested in this as something other than a personal journey of self-discovery and a way to meet others. I was drawn to my practitioner certification after some years growing in community as part of Hakomi Lancaster and feeling my practice deepening in different ways; through seeing changes in my day to day life as well as my natural curiosity leading me to discussions with other students and exploring how we understood Hakomi as a practice. In particular, a group of us used to practise and study together – we were very excited to be learning Hakomi and there was joy in doing this together. From this group I came to know one of my closest friends. I also had the privilege of learning from wonderful trainers and mentors: Trudy and Vicky. There was a deep sense of community for me with them, Josh and others. Through my long history in education and a desire to give back to a community I felt was giving so much to me, and through the relationships that had grown between us, it seemed so natural and organic that I became more involved.

Timeline:

• My journey with Hakomi started in January 2012 and I attended weekend trainings in Lancaster as well as some of the retreats in Sheffield and Devon for a longer, more immersive experience.

• I completed my 45 days of training in May 2016 and started practising and studying with three others in a regular group. During this time we offered free sessions to other Hakomi students and anyone interested in exploring themselves in this way.

• I went on to be certified as a Hakomi Practitioner in May 2018 and from then started assisting the Hakomi Lancaster training team. I also started offering workshops, practice groups and coaching groups in-person and online.

• I became a Hakomi Teacher in November 2020 and started teaching with Trudy and Vicky in 2021 as part of Hakomi Lancaster and most recently I have become a Hakomi Trainer, made official in August 2024.

My own explorations are taking me deeper into understanding my own neurodivergence and queerness and how embodied these experiences are. I can see that some of how I stand in relation to the many realms of being human is with some differences and I’m really interested and excited to bring these differences into my Hakomi offerings.

For anyone interested in learning about Hakomi and becoming certified, in the method, I can say this has always been a path of love for me, my only advice is to follow your heart.

In being welcomed into the Hakomi trainers team, I was inspired to write a poem that I think captures something of my process and where I stand in relation to Hakomi:

Always
by Jamie Fearn

It was never about becoming,
Or certificates or money.
Never about rubber stamps,
Or change and transformation.
It was never about doing or having or knowing.
Never even about learning, although I suspect that did happen too!

It was always about this different place,
where I meet you;
Right at the edge of where I end and you begin.
It was always about the gentle holding of a heart, or a hand or feet.
The rambunctious bleating and lowing and laughing!
The leaning in to solidity,
And the gruesome willingness to travel together even when it gets hard.
Into the thick of it,
Right to the heart.
It was always about love.

Following on from the last article, I wrote the following in December 2022, continuing with the theme of space and rest…

I wrote an article back in March 2021 on space being perhaps the first frontier we need to travel to, rather than the ‘final frontier’ as referenced by Star Trek (you can read the updated version of this here: https://jamiefearn.co.uk/2024/05/04/space-the-final-frontier/). I have often thought of this in the intervening months and the connection I make between space and rest. One definition of space is “a continuous area or expanse which is free, available, or unoccupied.” (from Oxford Languages) which I think captures something of the restfulness that I am often looking for and at this time of year when there can be a lot going on, it feels particularly relevant in my own life.

My relationship to space is complex and I don’t often seem to create it for myself (and I still have not made bread!). In self studying and through various readings and trainings I have been on, I am learning that this can be a trauma response and so part of learning to create space for myself is learning to work on my trauma and find ways to process it and this involves learning about and understanding trauma as well as body-mind practices that support my self-regulation. For more information on the connection between trauma and overwork, here is a good summary: https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/own-your-present/202108/is-anxiety-causing-you-overwork

Learning about my neurodivergence has also been part of understanding my relationship to space. There are lots of ways that I feel neurodivergent; managing chronic pain, being dyslexic and dyscalculic, having sensory processing sensitivities and auditory processing differences as well as complex trauma, as mentioned above. I went on a pain management programme this year after becoming really ill having stopped taking care of my bodyself in the way I knew I needed to. What had been a manageable chronic pain problem that I’d experienced for many years, became really unbearable. I have come to look at my nervous system like our roads; with motorways and A roads and country roads, all with traffic. Each sensory input is like more traffic on the road and some things really increase the traffic, such as being in more pain, not getting enough sleep, lots of social activity… When I’m experiencing ‘more traffic’, it means that I find it more difficult to manage my stress, pain, work and pretty much most things. It also means there’s more chance of a ‘crash’ such as a pain flare up and so I need space in a really physiological way that goes beyond rest and having down-time.

One of the biggest lessons I have learnt over the last year is that rest is an active process, it’s not just simply ‘doing nothing’. I understand this in different ways. Stopping and doing nothing can be part of resting – if we keep pushing ourselves to work and ‘do’ when we are tired, then we will burn out – the first law of thermodynamics, that energy cannot be created or destroyed, means that if we keep using energy and not replacing it somehow, it will run out – we don’t have an infinite supply. Spoon theory explains really well how important energy management is and you can read about this here:  https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/

So stopping expending energy is only the start of rest. I think that when we do this, our bodyself can start to regenerate through its natural processes, and so when I stop doing, I know that my inactivity doesn’t mean that nothing is happening – I am not consciously working or expending energy but things are happening inside me. A great example of this is during sleep, our most obvious way to rest. During sleep, there are different ways our brain and nervous system process things using different brain states and this is essential for learning and memory and is also essential to our physical health.

So rest is both a stopping and an active process, in the sense of needing to stop so we don’t burn out, and when we do stop, things are happening inside of us that are essential to our health. The other aspect of rest for me, is also about an active process. In managing chronic pain, often lack of movement can be a cause of pain. Gone are the days that rest was advised for musculoskeletal pain, and there’s so much research about the importance of exercise and movement – this is how we nourish our joints!

In thinking about space in these ways, I’ve also been thinking about the different areas of life this has an impact on and share a little about each below.

My different types of space:

Sensory processing – things that help my senses feel less overloaded. I tend to need quiet and/or outdoor time. You will rarely find me listening to music or with the TV or radio on in the background. Sometimes resting my senses means engaging them – like being in nature and filling my senses with the beauty and sounds of that can be really relaxing. Sometimes it means turning down the noise on my senses – cutting down screen time. A good set of ear plugs and noise cancelling headphones have been vital!

Rest – time that is spent doing nothing – not expending energy for work or doing things for others and this can be mental and emotional (physical rest is covered separately). So for this, watching a film, doing a jigsaw or playing a computer or board game can create mental and emotional space because I don’t need to engage with my thoughts or emotions.

Expressive – space to express what is happening inside – when things are busy inside me and energy is being used internally holding thoughts and images or emotions, perhaps going back over conversations or thinking through something that has happened, it can really help to let some of this out. Different ways I might do this are through writing, talking, creating something external that represents something internal, like a collage, listening to music or singing something that fits with how I’m feeling.

Physical rest – I consider this separately because this for me means getting enough sleep and also being active enough which includes stretching, walking and building strength into my muscles so that the places where I experience pain are being physically supported through my musculoskeletal system.

Solitude and social rest – time away from others – this is particularly important as an introvert where time with others doesn’t always feel regenerative for me. Introversion is different to shyness or being antisocial, I do love being with others and I’m definitely not shy.

Environment – where I am can have a huge impact on how rested and spacious I feel – if I’m not in my own space or if I’m sharing my space with someone I don’t know as well, if my space is untidy or disorganised, if I’m travelling a lot or there’s less daylight (as there is at this time of year) or less time outdoors, it can really use up a lot of energy. How I make sense of this, is that familiarity allows our nervous systems to settle – we can be more habitual, which uses less resources i.e. less traffic in the nervous system.

Power – this feels such a complex subject to me, and I’m not sure I fully understand all the ways that this is important in relation to rest and space. The two examples coming to mind are around role power and cultural power. As a therapist and a teacher, these roles come with power and as such it is important to be aware of how this might impact others. Alongside this, it is a responsibility and so having spaces where I get to not be the responsible one is really important- and sometimes challenging! I think that there is a tension created in both having more power and having less power and so it feels important to be aware of power and privilege and how this might impact yours and others’ energies. i.e. if I don’t get to spend time with others who are neurodivergent or who at least understand how much energy that takes then it can be really draining.

In conclusion, space and rest feel like deeply interconnected aspects of experience- which is perhaps a very personal thing to me and also very essential in relation to looking after myself. I know I hold some self-judgment around rest and stopping and have to work at not seeing this as lazy. I wonder if you make the same connection in relation to space and rest and if you find ways to create spaces in the ways I share about above?

This piece was originally written in March 2021. Three years on and I seem to have developed some digestive reactivity around gluten which is a sad development for someone who loves bread the way I do! I also still have difficulty with taking time to rest, although I continue to schedule regular breaks and have some compassion for myself around those times sometimes being a way to catch up with life admin and other things that mean it’s not always so restful. Here’s what I wrote back then:

My word for this year is ‘space’ and as you might imagine it has come from a place of feeling not so much space, particularly around work and rest. I have worked really hard for all of my adult life, and have often struggled to get some sense of work-life balance in the past. In setting up my own business and moving away from the traditional 9-5 working pattern, I’m now presented with more opportunity to consider what work-life balance actually means to me, and also the tension between being fully responsible for this work and the pressures this then brings. I have been curious about a system that I’m in that means even when I take time out it doesn’t always feel like a rest or space. How we sometimes explore things in a Hakomi way is to create a verbal experiment. So the invitation is for you to take a moment to connect with yourself and allow the noise to drop, you might do this by tuning into your experience, maybe your breath or the sounds you can hear. From that place of turning your attention inwards, the invitation is then to notice that arises as you read the words… you can rest now. And in reading this you might notice your own ideas about rest and space arising – what does it mean to you to rest?

Some of my thinking around having a focus on the word ‘space’ this year has come from reading a quote by David Richo; ” Bread takes the effort of kneading but also requires sitting quietly while the dough rises…” So I have been thinking a lot about bread. I think a lot about bread anyway; I like bread! 🥖🍞 I’ve thought for a long while that part of my process when I’m studying or writing and thinking a problem through is that I often need some time away from it before I can finish it and it reminds me a lot of the bread making process (although I’ve never actually made bread, so maybe I need to try this out!). As part of my reflecting on this, I have been scheduling more regular time off and having an intention to give my doughy self some space to rest and expand. I do find it challenging to think of rest as part of what’s needed to do my work, and yet this is so true.

I love the writing of David Whyte, and in one of my favourite books (Consolations), he writes about REST; “In the first state of rest is the sense of stopping, of giving up on what we have been doing or how we have been being. In the second, is the sense of slowly coming home, the physical journey into the body’s un-coerced and un-bullied self, as if trying to remember the way or even the destination itself. In the third state is a sense of healing and self-forgiveness and of arrival. In the fourth state, deep in the primal exchange of the breath, is the give and the take, the blessing and the being blessed and the ability to delight in both. The fifth stage is a sense of absolute readiness and presence, a delight in and an anticipation of the world and all its forms; a sense of being the meeting itself between inner and outer, and that receiving and responding occur in one spontaneous movement.” There is something in these words that seems to connect mind, body, emotions and spirit and coming home to a self that recognises the wisdom of the body and what is needed to arrive in this experience of full presence. So I have been sitting with these words and wondering if they might be a pathway to rest and space.

It feels for me that when we are wired for giving and other, resting and receiving the gift of space to ourselves can feel uncomfortable. I also think it is perhaps part of our culture in the western world that we have to achieve and there seems to be a certain social pressure about what achievement and success is. It also feels related to a system we’re in that our minds can keep us going and some beliefs about ‘mind over matter’.  Over these first months of the year and pondering all of this, I also was drawn to this talk by Tara Brach which feels like such a fit with some of these thoughts (it’s only 9 minutes long) and you can watch or listen to it here: https://youtube.com/watch?v=9cTq3Q6yWp4

What I took from this was about making it a practice to rest; that what I need to accomplish and get better at is coming back to myself to find that place of pause and rest in the enoughness of right here and making that the centre of my personal, professional and spiritual life. Tara talks about holding the paradox with humour and it feels for me that this paradox is something like, working hard to ‘get pretty damn relaxed’ as Ron Kurtz might say! I called this article ‘space… the final frontier’ as a tribute to Star Trek and one of the few well known phrases I know about space. I watched Star Trek religiously when I was younger, and I have been a big fan. In thinking about space I wonder if instead of the final frontier, space needs to be the first frontier we voyage to?

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this- how do you create space for yourself? ☁️💫 Or do you get stuck in a system of go go go?🚦🏎

I originally posted this after the murder of George Floyd in June 2020 (he died on the 25th May 2020). He was at the time the same age as I am now. It seems like such a pivotal point for many, including myself, in our journey around awareness of race and privilege. Since then it has been important to me to deepen my understanding and so I started studying Resmaa Menakem’s book My Grandmother’s Hands in a group. This book is a deep exploration of the embodied nature of racialised trauma, it feels to me a powerful love letter, inviting everyone to find healing. Resmaa also offers a free online ecourse: https://courses.culturalsomaticsinstitute.com/courses/cultural-somatics-free-5-session-ecourse and more in depth training.

I have maintained my interest in developing myself in this area, more recently following the work of Tricia Hersey that you can find here: http://www.triciahersey.com/ and Tema Okun’s work that you can find here: https://www.whitesupremacyculture.info/

Here is the original article:

I haven’t posted on social media in a while, trying to get my head around what is happening in the world at the moment, and how to express how I feel about it all and how I do that in a way which is authentic and respectful of others, and not about being performative.

This image by Lorie Shaull (www.lorieshaull.com) speaks to me in lots of ways; of how art is so impactful in expressing those things that need more than words; the combination of George Floyd’s image, the names of other black people murdered by police, the words ‘say our names’ and the flowers and tributes left by others. It speaks to me of how ritual and acknowledgement are so important in coming to terms with death, and how different sorts of ritual and acknowledgement feel called for in this situation. The mural in the picture is by Xena Goldman https://www.instagram.com/xenastuff/ Cadex Herrera https://www.instagram.com/cadexherrera/ Greta McLain https://www.instagram.com/gretamclain/ Niko Alexander https://www.instagram.com/nikoalexander9 Maria Javier https://www.instagram.com/maria.javier.98434997/ and Pablo Hernandez https://www.instagram.com/dog_bowl_repairman/ and has been created on the corner of 38th Street and Chicago Avenue South where George Floyd was arrested and murdered by police – the very people sworn to protect and serve, entrusted with power they abused. And whilst there are lots of pieces of art and murals being created around the world in response to George’s death, this permanent reminder of what happened feels so significant in this location – the place where he died. And there is something really important for me in knowing George’s name, and saying it. And in knowing and saying the names of all the people who have been murdered for the colour of their skin. This is not an isolated killing – it may have more media coverage than other murders, and part of what stands out to me in this mural is that it acknowledges the other people that I hadn’t heard of.

In thinking about all of this since it happened, my thoughts have turned towards the grief work that I do and how difficult this is in working with loss that isn’t deliberate, and how much more complicated this becomes when the person who has died is murdered by another human being, and when this is because of the colour of their skin, and has its roots in a culture that is racist. And how the white privilege of my skin means I do not know how it feels to wake up each day having fear that I might be treated in this way, and that when I surround myself with other white people, I do not fear that my loved ones will be lost in this way.

I feel a heaviness in my heart that as human beings we can do this and for how I have contributed to this by my own passivity. I feel I have much work to do in the position of privilege that I have, and I’m committed to doing work in this area in a way that is embodied rather than developing my knowledge on its own.

I usually tag my posts with art in them as #cathARTic and this does not feel like it is about the catharsis I usually mean – I am not looking for comfort here – as Cesar Cruz says “Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable.” – too long have I been comfortable.

This blog article was originally written after a wonderful experience in Bilbao in September 2019 with the international Hakomi conference. Reading back over it is moving, especially the poem. To re-remember that experience and how it felt to be with people I know well and others I didn’t know at all and yet felt familiar through our shared connection of our common interest in this practice of Hakomi. It seems fitting publishing this on my website as preparations are underway for the next international meeting that will go ahead in Mexico. I won’t be going to this and I feel sad not to be with others and also know this is the right decision for my just now with all that I am doing in life. Here are my reflections on that time back in 2019:

I spent just over a week in Bilbao at an international Hakomi conference. It has been a profound experience for me on so many levels and it is difficult to put into words what it all means.

To join so many people from all over the world and connect with them through our humanness, not just our shared practice of Hakomi, feels such a privilege. To go to the conference as a practitioner and an organiser, made it all the more special, and it was great to be a part of discussions about the future of our Hakomi community and how we might shape it and support those who have been carrying so much of Ron Kurtz’s legacy since he died in 2011.

It was a great learning for me to see the difference between our Hakomi practice and the Hakomi Education Network (HEN) and I felt like I came to a new understand of HEN as a vehicle that allows us to share Hakomi with the world, as well as maintain and develop our quality of practice that is so relevant to our deeper purpose of changing the world. These may seem like high aspirations, but when you have seen how Hakomi touches and transforms a human being… when you have been that person who is touched, it becomes easy to understand this feeling of a deeper purpose.

We talked a lot about leadership and what we would want a HEN leadership to focus on for the future. Our work in this was facilitated by Ross Gilchrist who brought so much to our community from his expertise in leadership development. When the call went out for volunteers to support this development work, I was reticent to put my name forward and at the same time curious, enthusiastic about what the community wanted to do, and feeling like I had something to offer from my own skills and experience. It wasn’t until some precious people in my life also suggested I put my name forward, that I actually did! Hearing something of my own inner hopes and ideas about myself echoed through others is such a beautiful thing, and to have them see in me the potential to contribute in this way gave me the confidence and affirmation to volunteer.

A turning point in the week for me was to hear about our new ethical framework, and how much of the heart of Hakomi it carries. I felt so much gratitude towards those who worked so hard to produce this beautifully crafted piece of writing. Unlike other ethical frameworks I’ve read, this came across as so much more than words on a page; it feels to me like a living thing that can create and hold space for the difficulties we have in relationships and with imbalances of power. It gives us a framework and support for having courageous conversations about the difficulties we might face, and to help us resolve them or manage them where this is not possible, recognising that not all conflict can be fully resolved. This ethical framework is an invitation to a spiritual practice of returning again and again to our best selves and a position of self study. A beautiful quote that was shared in this part of the conference was from Miller Williams; “Have compassion for everyone you meet, even if they don’t want it. What seems conceit, bad manners, or cynicism is always a sign of things no ears have heard, no eyes have seen.” This feels so poignantly true and not always easy to hold in the face of those behaviours, and helps me recognise the need for compassion with my own conceit, bad manners and cynicism.

Seeing our process unfold as a community, in distilling down to what we really want and what is the real essence of what we want to bring to the world as the Hakomi Education Network was such an interesting experience to be part of. I enjoyed the creative aspects of creating a vision board in a group together, and the joy of being able to share my own ideas and what is in my heart for the community and I also felt my edges in the frustrations of not having my voice heard, or giving way to others’ ideas about things. Being able to hand four words to the new Leadership Team that would act as a guiding light of what we cannot lose felt like a rich experience, and both unbelievable that so many of us could come to those words, and also not enough. Conscious. Responsive. Heart-centred. Community. These are the things we cannot lose.

Alongside this precious time in Bilbao, the experience of traveling on my own to another country had its challenges for me. By chance I met someone on the journey that I could travel with which really eased my mind. The practicalities of settling into a different culture, finding my way around, having more time on my own, not having the usual things to do and navigating being vegetarian in another country had both its highs and lows, and was made so much easier having shared accommodation with some amazing people. These were precious times indeed. The significance of meeting in Bilbao and this being a symbol of transformation, paralleled with each of us, symbols of transformation, and with the practice of Hakomi, itself a way of transforming and which has been so much a part of my own experience of transformation.

For the last few days of the Hakomi conference, the doors were opened to anyone wanting to experience Hakomi. Contained within this for me, were moments of beauty and connection that felt really powerful and are still with me to this day. From a practitioner perspective, it was so interesting to see how people work all over the world, how practices are different and yet they are to me, so recognisably Hakomi. This reinforces again how creative a practice this is, one which holds space for everyone. From a personal level, to be with people that I love from this community, and to get to know people I haven’t known as well, to meet new people and feel so connected, is so heart opening, so moving and so precious. To be able to be vulnerable in my introversion, feeling at times overwhelmed by the enormity of what was happening; over a hundred people, gathered in a room, practicing Hakomi together, is a truly amazing experience!

There is a William James quote that was shared during our time in Bilbao: “we with our lives are like islands in the sea, or like trees in the forest. The maple and the pine may whisper to each other with their leaves… But the trees also commingle their roots in the darkness underground, and the islands also hang together through the ocean’s bottom.” This feels such a beautiful representation of how I see the Hakomi community and what happened in Bilbao.

I wrote this poem in response to my experience and it feels like it captures some of what it felt like to be there:

Human poetry

I move in the ordinariness of my life,

Feeling extraordinary.

Still moved by the touch of your love;

Yes, yours!

Carried in a bubble of warmth and tenderness.

Steeped in human poetry; seen and heard, felt and carried in my heart.

My world is not the same because of you;

You that have carried so much for so long, for me and for others,

You that taught the steps to gracefully dance in courageous conversations,

You who saw me when I thought I was unseen,

You who carried the tender of our meeting,

You who saw my courage,

You that I know and yet you showed me more of you; you dared to share something precious.

You that I did not know at all except through the words of another;

On your face I saw my pain, and you shared the magical flame you saw me whisper in the dark.

You that met me in my shame with your gentleness.

You that saw me with new eyes and heard me with new ears.

You, my guide light from afar, guiding me in to land each day.

You that shared your pain, up close and from a distance.

You that I did not speak to at all, that travelled from near and far,

All of you that I shared time and food and space and words with; precious meetings.

All these lives, touched and touching, moved and moving.

Too many moments to fit in these small words.

Too many moments that move me still so I try to fit them in these small words.

Now I am left, transformed by you,

Yes, you!

Holding such gratitude and love for you.

Two small words that hold so much in this moment:

Thank you.

This article was originally written back at the beginning of 2019 when I first started writing my blog.

If you are here, it is likely that you are looking for help of some sort. I often describe my own journey as finding pieces of a jigsaw that help me make sense of things. Sometimes I find these inside of myself, sometimes they come from others.

Finding help for me has been something of a challenge over the years, and in setting up my website and writing profiles on various directories, I have been thinking about how I might make that easier for someone, for you hopefully. I’ve reflected on the things that have worked for me, and in truth, I find it difficult when faced with a list of people, who all write about how many things they can support me with, and have so much information. It seems overwhelming.

So what I try to offer in all my writings, is something of who I am. The research is clear, it is not the technique that is helpful, it is the relationship (Cooper, 2008). So it feels important in deciding who you work with to consider the relationship and how you feel with them. This is part of why I offer a 30 minute free consultation, to meet and experience something of what it would be like for us to work together.

The UK Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP) website has an article about this topic and in it asks a few questions that feel really important in meeting someone new and it can sometimes be useful to wait for a day or so after you meet them to ask these things (you can find the original article here https://www.psychotherapy.org.uk/seeking-therapy/how-to-choose-a-psychotherapist/):

• Would I feel comfortable telling them about intimate details of my life?
• Do I feel safe with them?
• Do I like their manner towards me?
• Could I be completely open with them?

One of the most powerful experiences I’ve had in working with a therapist was when I was asked to talk about my life using stones. They were all different shapes and sizes and so I picked different ones to represent people in my life and one to represent me. I placed the stones around me at different distances and talked about the people I feel connected to. At the end the therapist gave me the stone I’d chosen to represent myself. This was such an impactful expression of how I see therapy – as the therapist giving you back to yourself.

I hope that these words might be helpful in starting your journey to find someone to work with. It can be such a life changing experience to work with someone in this way and I hope that you’re able to find the right person for you.

If you are looking for therapy or have found it – what has helped you in that process? If you are already a therapist, how does this change how you look for therapy? I’d be really interested to hear more from you.

If you like to read, I found this blog article quite useful and it gives some practical steps to help you find someone: https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/blog/2018/09/24/how-to-find-a-counsellor

I also like this article from Mind which really gives lots of different options about ways to get therapy (including how to get free therapy through the NHS, charities, work or study: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/talking-therapy-and-counselling/how-to-find-a-therapist/

Reference:

Cooper, M. (2008). The facts are friendly. Therapy Today, 19 (7), 8-13.